June 22, 2008

balancing one and many

It's been a really hard week. Personal stuff in my life. Personal stuff in people's lives.

I work part-time for the church. I juggle preaching, creating mission spaces on the margins, managing a fairly complicated process in a 96 year old church, leading a team (all who are also part-time and all who are also juggling lives).

"Delegate" they cry, but you can't really delegate a crisis.

So the margins get shaved. Less time for me. Less time for family. Less time for a sermon. It was a week in which Sunday morning got the minimum. I would simply preach.

Suddenly it is Sunday. I look at people as they arrive. I face the consequences of my week and of my decisions. Do these people deserve my minimum? So many faces, so much complexity. How to word a child dedication amid child crisis? How to speak of joy amid pain? When all I have brought is my minimal offering.

Today, I have no idea how to be pastoral, how to balance the one and the many, how to speak with the clarity that the week demands.

Posted by steve at June 22, 2008 06:58 PM
Comments

Sounds like a demanding week and sounds like you're being a bit tough on yourself and perhaps underestimating the grace of your congregation. I don't know what the 'child crisis' is you speak of but I know for me when I lost my son I was grateful for every stumbling attempt at compassion - what was less helpful was those who avoided me not because they didnt care but because they worried about getting it wrong. So I'd say - you were there on Sunday and you gave of yourself despite having little left and that is enough. Hope you've had some time for family and re-charging today, Jack

Posted by: Jack at June 23, 2008 06:05 PM

thanks for the transparency, steve

there are no super-heroes, no magic wands

minimal offering is plenty

prayers all around you & yours

Posted by: bob carlton at June 24, 2008 06:13 AM

Having a hard week too. Don't wanna overspiritualize, but seems like ministry puts us in the firing line personally, familywise and there we have to deal with the crap of others. Praying 4 ya. decided we need a group of 7 praying every day for us. Gonna ask them tomorrow. Do you have people specifically praying 4 you?

Posted by: Negrito at June 25, 2008 11:46 PM

"it's my blog so i'll be tough if i want to, tough if it want to".... :)

and yes, i blog honestly as a way of asking for prayer, plus have been emailing folk in the last week

steve

Posted by: steve at June 26, 2008 09:15 AM