sustain:if:able kiwi

18.5 weeks old

I did a wee farewell service tonight for Hine Rose P. who died in the womb at 18.5 weeks. Close friends and family gathered at the family home to mark an incredibly difficult roller coaster journey over the last 7 weeks.

Here was one of the prayers: In the middle is a bowl of water. Water means many things. It speaks of life and death. It speaks of soothing and healing. It speaks of relaxing and letting go and cleansing. Beside the bowl is some salt, representing tears and sadness; and some roses, for Hine Rose, a symbol of love and beauty and joy.

Any who want to may now pray. We can pray with words. We can also pray with actions. You may want to
– make a fist in anger
– hold your palms open in release
– swirl your hands praying comfort
– make sign of cross as a speaking of hope
– add some salt to the water
– float a petal

If you would like to make this prayer your own, either for yourself or for others know who have been through miscarriage, you could add your initials in the comments.

A pastoral note: I’ve never done a service like this before. Normally miscarriages are a thing kept quiet. But I’ve had numbers of older woman thanking me and sharing their pain over the fact that their grief was never publicly marked.